As someone once told me, there is only one person, in the entire world, who I can fully trust. That person is me. Nobody else, no matter who long we know each other. Because people change, they change their values, goals, dreams. Everything that makes them … them.
We get attached to a feeling someone or something makes us feel. And sometimes we get addicted to it. This can go both ways: good or bad; it’s up to you. But because people do change, move and ultimately grow, those feelings also change.
Feeling in love is a very specific thing. “I am in love with you” means I am addicted to you, I love this about you or that. And I want more. But when something changes in this equation, then love changes. It can shift or even disappear.
As much as I would like to believe in everlasting love, I don’t believe in such a thing (or… I still need to be proven wrong). There is no life with perfect happiness. There will always be some side hassle, and that what we call happiness are some random, rather tiny moments, sprinkled along as you go through life.
It sounds sad, but it’s truly optimistic. I had to let go of the romantic perspective over life in general, and enjoy each moment as it comes. Unfortunately, the romantic view of love and relationships has still a lot of influence upon most of us, no matter what.
We tend to believe love means to be in a relationship, to do things together, while actually doing nothing. But that is not all. Love can be a place, you can be in love with a feeling your passion provides, for a perspective you may have or for the simple way you feel in a place, at a certain time. All of these are expressions of love, which are often underappreciated.
Realising the incredible miracle of all the surrounding things that had to align for an experience, is something beyond words.
The decision to jump into that train at the last second, before departure; the decision of meeting a complete stranger to explore a city together, having an extra (unplanned) beer by the lake on that hot summer afternoon. Those are small, tiny, authentic moments of love. And happiness.
Often, the travelling life provides new and exciting experiences. It has many ups and downs. And that’s why it reveals more clearly this simple truth:
Life is made up of tiny moments and it’s up to me to make the most out of it. In the end, all I’ll have left will be to look back and remember those happy times.
From a place of love and understanding, there will be more to come and to be shared. The way I embrace each experience will always determine the moments and memories of that. It’s not the place. It’s not the people. Nor the weather or food. It’s me. And deciding to be in love or not … it’s something that’s under my control. My decision.
PS: I remembered what I was always wishing for when I was blowing the candles on my birthday cake, or for New Years. I was always wishing I will be happy. But now I’ve learnt I need to be specific. Now I’m wishing to travel as much as possible.