Lesson 2: Find out what works for you

As I was born into this world, I couldn’t talk and I couldn’t understand any type of language. I was making automatic decisions based on what I was feeling. And how something made me feel. Pretty much the same way we do as adults, but at a basic level. Using the same idea, please find out what works for you. Here are bits of my story and thoughts.

As children, most of us discovered what food and colours we liked, by trying it. By exploring it. By trying things out. And by failing, too.

As I grew older and my conscience settled in, I lost touch with myself and lost the desire of exploring and experiencing. Or better said, I got more afraid of failures and was giving up before even trying out a new thing. Which is just stupid.

How am I suppose to know what kind of job suits me or what is my hobby, if not by trying, exploring and discovering new things? Just the way a child does, as he is discovering the world.

Never stop discovering what works for you

You might find something you really enjoy. But don’t stop and don’t settle. As people evolve and expand, the mind does the same.

Do you have the same favourite games as when you were 5 years old? I am not saying it was wrong, but probably it was different than the games you like today. Yes, this example may be exaggerated, but is true. The human being is meant to evolve and to grow. Both physically and mentally. The body changes and so does the mind.

I remember I loved milk when I was a child. Cold milk. I would drink a full glass of cow’s milk just like other people eat dessert. Years later, on a random morning, my body decided it could not have it anymore. It was the last time I drank cow’s milk. Not because I chose that, but because my body didn’t need it anymore. Frankly, I am not sure that it ever did.

Every small change impacts the whole. As I stopped drinking milk, so I slowly started to revise and change what I was eating. There is no independent change or decision. Everything gets impacted and a series of small changes eventually lead to bigger changes.

As a result of becoming an adult, food habits and other things I am not sure of, I started to gain weight. It was a transforming period for me, and that was when I first realised how things were going not so great for me. A self-discovery journey had begun and it was the best thing that ever happened, although it was marked by a lot of suffering and pain.

Rediscovering your needs and wants as an adult

I then realized I needed to get to know myself, as I had lost touch with my wants and needs. And now I can say that can happen when we are living to the standards of others. I had a job I didn’t like, trying to please some people I had nothing in common with, and pursuing nothing more than the day of tomorrow. That didn’t help with my health state either.

But somehow, I manage to get myself out of that state, by challenging my condition and limitations. I left everything to become a volunteer. Moved to Turkey and that was hard, but brought me closer to the person I am today. Learnt about myself in those 2 months in Turkey more than in the last decade. It was liberating and it helped me get a new perspective.

I am not saying everyone should do the same, but fur sure a change of perspective can help one’s state. I might add, the further, the better. Because when you get away from your everyday issues, you escape those feelings that get you trapped in the first place, and you can decide easier if that stuff, job, relationship, whatever it is that you are doing, it’s worth your time. I tend to say, that if it’s eating you inside and doesn’t let you sleep, you don’t need it.

I discovered a lot about my culture by paying close attention to theirs. And a whole lot more about myself. When you see something each day, you tend to not pay it any more attention. But when you see something for the first time, it almost looks like a miracle, so fascinating and new. You enter a new dimension of the same old situation.

In Turkey, I discovered what kind of food I love and which one I hate, what kind of clothes I love to wear, how to treat people and how to not take personally every word or gesture of others.

What diet works for you?

Somewhere along the way, I found out about the vegan culture, with all of its ideas and diet. I found it daring and new. It fascinated me. Of course, I was too afraid to talk about it to people around me, as I am afraid of rejections. But that didn’t stop me from wanting to try it out. My body was not reacting well to what I used to eat anyway, so I thought I should give it a try for a month.

And I did that. At first, I had no idea what and how to eat and I was a chaos pretty much all the time. But even so, something clicked and changed me from the inside. I wrote about this experience (among others) in lesson 1: You can Achieve your dream.

It’s been more than 3 and a half years since then and I had never considered I want to change my habits or my diet back.

A more detailed post on my 3-year vegan journey will come soon. 

Find out what works for you

I don’t believe we are all the same. Neither is our body the same. I cannot recommend you any diet that will work for you (it could work, but that is uncertain). That is the whole point of trying out things, of experimenting and saying “no” to those which are not for you. I am talking about everything.

I truly believe that wellbeing, happiness and inspiration comes from inside. Feel well inside and it will show on the outside. A person who is feeling well, will be contagious and be able to create wellbeing. For others and for himself. Find that thing or combinations o habits that work for you, in order to become that person.

Don’t be afraid to say “no” to a job, to a relationship, to culture, religion, whatever it is.  The world has thrived BECAUSE there is diversity. And I believe we should be educated to explore it and to choose from it. Find out what works for you!

Eat what nourishes your body and your mind, even if that is not what you used to eat. Socialize with people that inspire you and have similar visions to yours, not only with those that you are used to. Dare to do that job that drives you to get up in the morning, not that one that you are used to doing. Because “used to” is doomed to become nothing.